“When I see potential, I just gotta see it through.” – Work // Rihanna ft. Drake
This is the Bowery Mansion, an urban legend and landmark down in NYC’s LES. For years, it’s been abandoned, untouched on the inside and a physical accumulation for graffiti and street artists alike on the outside, perpetually under unfinished construction…until now. And to be honest, it kind of hurt to know that’s one less part of history I’ll be able to have proof of in the future.
That’s the bittersweet thing about change — you think that letting go of the past you’ve grown comfortable with (whether you actively embrace it or begrudge it) will be the most painful part, but it’s really the uncertainty that the next chapter just won’t do those humble beginnings any justice.
I thought seeing this building change in front of my eyes was a huge reflection of parallels in my own life lately. I mean, I did go to school a few blocks from this building as a child, and that school (also a national landmark) was recently blown up to make room for condominiums. But the reason I say this is because the past month or so has taught me a lot about how I see change: it’s not that I’m afraid of it, in fact I encourage change because it also implies growth when done right. But I am afraid of being forgotten. Of giving all my heart and soul into things and to people, just so that I can be treated like a temporary fix. I know a lot of this stems from experiences I have had in the past and I’m trying hard to fight it but sometimes the past repeats itself, as it is doing in my present at this very moment.
So I’ll just ask you. Whoever YOU are.
How much of the past should we carry with us? How often do you walk past the same building everyday, rooted in the idea it will always be there to reassure you of where you are? How much do we depend on our surroundings to call a place home?
How much of ourselves do we leave untapped because we’re waiting for someone else to break down the door for us?
Because recognizing potential is one thing and acting upon it is another.
It took me a while to understand what was happening in my life lately but I’m admitting now that I put myself in situations where my value was often defined by how often someone needed me, and that shouldn’t always be the case.
Regardless of how much it hurts,
Today is a new day.
And tomorrow will be, too.